We are all haunted. Each and every one of us. Some of us are haunted by our failures, some by our successes. Some of us by our future, and some by our past. Some of us are haunted by fear, and some of us by uncertainty. If you think about it, there is one common thread here. Time.
It’s something that we have enough of, and not too much of either. Time is endless, and also, time is finite. A problem with a lot of us, perhaps the biggest problem, is that we are unable to differentiate between our past, present and future. Most of us dwell in our past while thinking about the future and eventually, lose what matters the most.
If you ask an old person what they valued the most in life, and what they wish’d they had more of, they’d tell you that it was time. That they wish they’d had a little more time to do the things that mattered most to them, that they had a little more time to spend with their children, with their parents, with themselves. The most expensive gift of all, and perhaps the most valued gift of all, is time.
Is it time that haunts us? Is it the fear that there isn’t enough? Or the misconception that there is enough and realizing when it’s up that there was hardy any to begin with at all? There are a few constants in life, and I believe that time is one of them. It may sound ridiculous, for time is ever-changing, but time is the one thing you can depend on in life. No matter what happens, time remains constantly as it is, ever-changing.
What haunts most people, is what time has previously done to them. All the uncertainty, the failures, the fears, the fights, the inconsistencies, the betrayals and all the loss, all of it is encapsulated in something defined by time itself, called the past. It’s unwise to judge yourself or others by what happened in the past. The past is all about what a person used to be, it’s never about who they are. Of course, the statement holds true only if the person in consideration here has learned from their past. The wisest thing to do with your past, is just that, to learn from it. To realize where you fell apart, to pick up the pieces, and to move on always keeping in mind, to never break the same way again.
It’s a human tendency to weigh oneself down. To think about the past and about what we’ve done and decide what’s going to happen in the future. To try and predict the future and your actions is, of course human, but to control your actions and decide the future is what makes you rise above the rest. The past is a book to learn from, the present is a field to practice it upon, and the future is a field to reap the benefits in.
Time is being added to your past each day, it’s up to you to decide what you want to put into it to overshadow things you wish had never happened. In a certain sense, you still have control over your past and you can decide from this moment on what your past will contain. Will it be a collection of events and efforts that will weigh you down? Or is it going to be a cumulation of achievements and triumphs that will forever shine?
Each man has a billion excuses for his past, but know this, you have none for your future. You never will.
You have time. The questions in your head should not circle around what happened in your past and how it could have been different. They should circle around what you want in your future and you can make it happen. No one can do this for you, you have to take upon this task yourself. For in the end, it is your life, and you will have no one else to blame. You may sit down, look back, reflect and wish that things had been different and blame everyone else for the shortcomings of your life. Accept that this is your life and that if you can blame anyone for its shortcomings, it’s only because you weren’t in control of your own life.
You have a lot of time. It doesn’t matter if you work 12 hours a day and sleep 4 hours a night, we all have the same amount of time, and it is we who decide how we’re going to use it. When your time is up and when your life is done, what do you want to look back on? What do you want your life to be about? How are you from today, going to define and construct your past?
What are you going to do… with time?